Reflecting back on Poland

It has been a week since returning from Poland and I have had a lot of time to reflect and think about my experience and all of the knowledge that I acquired since being there. Since being home, many people have asked me how the experience was, whether it was enjoyable or not, or whether or not I had fun. Fun? Fun is not the right word to use when describing the experience. It has taken me time to process everything and be able to put into words how this experience was, and I can truly say it was an eye-opening experience that allowed me to expand my knowledge of the holocaust.

Throughout my time in Poland, there were some difficult days and days that were harder than others, especially the days where we walked through the camps and heard the stories of the prisoners. With each story I heard I tried to imagine myself as a prisoner and what it would be like in the camps and I could not process it. I do not think that I would have lasted longer than a week! Returning from the camps on those difficult days, I would head straight to my room and sit in bed thinking about everything I just learned about and what I saw. A lot of days were emotional. Meeting past students who had gone on the trip, and hearing their stories of the emotions you would feel, made it easier to get through those days. Hearing them tell us it would be okay to cry or not cry helped tremendously. I also felt that the reflections really put into perspective what I saw that day or what I was feeling.

Throughout my time in Poland, I realized that some of what I have learned about the Holocaust, especially in school, has been false or not entirely true. This made me realize that my goal after returning from the trip is to educate others on the events that took place during the Holocaust. How the events took place; why they took place; who tried to help. The education system/curriculum needs to revise what they teach in schools about what took place during the Holocaust. It is important to educate students properly and truthfully so that we can learn from history and hopefully be able to prevent another heinous crime such as this, from happening again.

Many of these prisoners were extremely brave and showed tremendous courage. One prisoner who showed courage and was brave and that stood out to me, was Maximillian Kolbe. He volunteered to take the place of a prisoner who was going to be sent to death after calling out for both his wife and children. Maximillian was sent to a starvation room where he died. This story has stuck with me the most because I thought about what I would do in his position, would I had volunteered to take a prisoner’s place? I honestly do not know if I would be as brave and courageous as he was. I would hope that the strength and resilience, the faith and courage that the prisoners showed during this horrible time will continue to be documented, so that schools will continue to educate students on the events that occurred during the Holocaust, so that it is never forgotten, that the people will always be remembered, and that something like that will never happen again.

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Survivors in 2019

For the past few years, I have commonly heard that we are losing the greatest generation. This phrase refers to those who were born in the time period of 1901 to 1927, and many of these people fought in WWII. This generation also includes the survivors of the Shoah. Unfortunately, those who were old enough to have memories of being in the Holocaust are getting older and older and passing away.

While we were at the JCC, or the Jewish Community Center in Krakow, we attended a Shabbat service and dinner. While we were waiting for the service to start, a husband and wife came in, and the wife started asking us about our trip. Her husband joined and we soon found out that he was a child survivor. He was born in Berlin, Germany, and was nine years old when restrictions started being placed on Jewish people. He told us how he remembered his mother giving him a sweater with a gold star on it, and how she told him he had to wear it at all times. This was the modern version of Canon 68, put out by the Fourth Lateran Council stipulating that Jews and Saracens had to be distinguishable through their dress. One day on his way to school he decided not to wear it. He was stopped by officers in brown uniforms who asked him where he was going. He pointed to his books and backpack and said he was going to school. They asked him if he was a Jew. He said he clearly remembered the anxiety he felt in that moment, not knowing the right answer to the question. Unfortunately, we did not get to hear the end of the story because we were interrupted.

He also told us how he remembered Kristallnacht. His father owned a few shops, and he remembered all the broken glass and the looting that happened to his father’s stores. After Kristallnacht, his family fled Germany and ended up in Panama. From there they were able to gain access to the US. He was able to live his life and get PhDs in economics. He built a successful career in areas of nuclear energy and artificial intelligence.

I thought it was really interesting and impactful to meet a child survivor, especially in the place of his worship. Six million Jewish people never got the opportunity to get PhDs or educations because they were targeted for their beliefs. His family was lucky. They were able to escape Germany before they were shipped to either a concentration camp, a forced labor camp, or even a death camp. He was very open about sharing his story, and we were really fortunate to be able to get to opportunity to meet him and hear his story. It makes me think about all the survivors who are going about their daily lives while still bearing the weight of their experiences in the Shoah.

A map of many of the place Jews were deported from.

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We remember: A Struggle Between Good and Evil

I am currently on the plane leaving Poland to head home. Being on this long flight has given me time to reflect. My experience this week has been nothing short of incredible. It is difficult to put into words the amount of knowledge and experience I have received. My knowledge of the Shoah and Jewish-Christian relations has increased further than I ever thought possible. I have noticed a reoccurring theme of good vs evil throughout this trip. The Shoah was an experience of absolute evil, but what I have learned is that the Shoah also contained some of the purest forms of good. It is vital for our future to learn from this evil and to try to develop a world of good.

The suffering of Jews preceded the Holocaust. This hate went as far back as the 1500’s when Martin Luther announced his dissertation demonetizing and denouncing the Jewish religion. Since then it has only gotten worse. The Shoah was a break in history, the worst case of inhumaneness the world had ever seen. A quote by Father Emil Shofani states:

“It is not about good vs evil, but where is the person, the respect for a person? Where is the human being? That is the question.”

The concept of good vs evil can be seen as a choice. The topic of whether it was a choice is controversial. I personally believe that it was both. I think it was a choice to join Hitler’s regime. I think it was a choice to pull the trigger on an innocent child. I think it was a choice to lead a family into the gas chambers. However there was fear. Fear led to peer pressure of doing what the other SS men had to do. Fear of not following orders and what those consequences may be for you and your family. Many believed they did not have a choice; therefore they were not good nor evil they were just human. Humans following orders and doing a job to survive.

The struggle between good and evil is an ongoing battle even today. Over this past week I have seen many memorials that commemorate the 6 million lives lost. Memorials to honor those who have suffered. When I was visiting the grounds of what was the Plaszow concentration camp, I came across this large monument. It depicted five people with sullen faces. There was a large crack across the five figures. To me this crack represents the break in history that is the Shoah. The monument is there to remind us to learn from the past. It reminds us to remember the evil and build a future of good. They are unfortunately far too many instances of evil surrounding the holocaust even today. There are still holocaust deniers that are attempting to educate the youth of false facts and hate speech. There are still anti-Semites who praise the work Hitler had done. In the words of Stanley Ronell we must “deny the deniers.” We can no longer be bystanders. We must act against the hate and continue the legacy of the 6 million people who were murdered. It is our job as witnesses to educate others about the tragic past of the holocaust. As the saying goes "those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it."

This image depicts the monument on the ground of what was the Plaszow concentration camp. This monument was created to commemorate the Poles and Jews who lost their lives there.

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The Presence of Absence

The presence of absence and the absence of presence has been a prominent theme throughout this course. I have stumbled upon many places in Poland that have reminded me of this theme. One place in particular that stood out to me as symbolizing this theme is Mariana Kolodzieja’s art exhibit. Mariana Kolodzieja was a Polish Christian holocaust survivor. He became one of the first prisoners in the 1940 transport to Auschwitz, his number was 432. In the absence of speech, Mariana chose to portray his personal experience of the Shoah using stunning images and illustrations. Mariana stated,

“… this is not an exhibition, nor art. These are not pictures. These are words locked in drawings. /…/ I propose a journey by way of this labyrinth marked by the experience of the fabric of death. Please, read my designed words, words born also from the yearning for clarity of criteria, from the yearning to understand what separates good from evil, truth from lie, art from appearance. /…/ It is a rendering of honor to all those who have vanished in the ashes.” (Mariana Kolodzieja, nr 432)

Mariana is stating that the presence of his art is honoring the absence of the 6 million lives lost. He asks visitors to read his work, to begin to understand his experience and to understand the difference between good and evil. He wants us to remember and honor those who lost their lives in this atrocious battle of hate.

Mariana’s artwork often contained sketches of Maximillian Kolbe. As I stated before in my previous blog post, Maximillian Kolbe was a Franciscan friar who became a prisoner in Auschwitz. He heroically gave his life for another man in order to save him from his ultimate death. Kolbe represented the presence of love when it was absent, the presence of kindness when it was scarce, and the presence of hope when there was none. I believe Mariana was fascinated with Kolbe because of the effect his presence had on the morale of the other prisoners. Another example of the absence of hate and the presence of kindness is shown in the memoir The Holocaust Kingdom by Alexander Donat. Alexander recalls a particular instance when compassion was expressed in a place where it was far too absent. He was on his way to the Radom ghetto after leaving Lublin. Alexander as well as several other prisoners were desperate, exhausted, and ultimately dying. They were invited to this Jewish man’s home for dinner on the Sabbath. Not only was Alexander “well” fed, but he also received medical attention as well as rations from other Jewish people in the ghetto. This act of kindness awakened the humanity in Alexander.

This painting was completed by Mariana Kolodzieja. The man illustrated in this painting is Maximillian Kolbe, number 16620. He is wearing a crown of thorns to represent that his martyrdom is that of Jesus.

The theme, the presence of absence and the absence of presence, can also be visible in an object itself rather than an exact event or location. This object is a flower. Flowers are used by Christians as a way to pay respect and honor those who have passed whereas someone who follows Judaism uses stones. Flowers represent beauty, growth, renewal, and hope. When I was visiting Auschwitz II Birkenau, I noticed beautiful white roses placed intermediately throughout the camp. Block number 16A had the most flowers. This block was used to imprison polish children of war. Many perished in the gas chamber as well as from the horrendous conditions. The roses were perfectly aligned on a barrack bed. The presence of the roses represents the absence of the polish children as well as all those who lost their lives in Birkenau, they represent hope for a better future. This theme was also noticeable when visiting the town of Oswiecim. We visited a field that once held a beautiful synagogue. This synagogue was the biggest in the town at the time, it could hold 2000 people. It was unfortunately destroyed by the Nazi regime during the Shoah. In the vacant space of what was a synagogue now grows angelic yellow flowers. The presence of the blooming flowers represents the absence of the synagogue. It was a remarkable site.

This image depicts the white roses on the bed in barrack 16A. A tribute to the children of war who lost their lives in the hell of Auschwitz II Birkenau.

This image portrays the angelic yellow flowers that grow and bloom in the vacant field where a synagogue once stood.

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Where Was God?

I have been in Oswiecim for two full days now. My experience thus far has been overwhelming. My knowledge on Jewish culture, Jewish-Christian relations, as well as the Shoah itself has grown exponentially. On our second day we visited Auschwitz I. When I entered the camp my mind went numb. I think it was then when I saw the infamous sign, “Arbeit Macht Frei,” that I truly realized that I was standing on the world’s largest burial ground. As we walked through the camp Marta, our tour guide, was re-counting the different events that took place in Auschwitz. She took us inside barrack number 11. This barrack was known for its inhumane acts of violence and torture. It contained a dark room, a starvation room , stand up chambers, as well as numerous different torture cells. Marta retold the story of Maximillian Kolbe. Maximillian Kolbe was a Franciscan Friar as well as a prisoner in Auschwitz. In 1941 a prisoner escaped. The SS men have this policy known as “collective responsibility” meaning that if one prisoner escapes ten people will be held responsible for his actions and suffer the consequences, and that’s exactly what happened. Ten random inmates were selected for death when Maximillian Kolbe heroically stepped up and offered to take the place of another prisoner by the name of Franciszek Gajownicze. He began to cry, "My wife! My children!” Kolbe wanted to give this man a chance at life. Kolbe was placed in the starvation cell with the nine other prisoners for two weeks. He survived the cell, however the SS men immediately injected him with phenol which caused him to have a heart attack and die. Another atrocity that took place at Auschwitz occurred in barrack number 10. In this barrack a gynecologist by the name of Dr. Clauberg would use women as guinea pigs and preform sterilization procedures. This was done so the she would not pass down her Jewish genetics to her offspring. Amongst all the various types of torture the most well known was the gas chambers. Hundreds of inmates of all ages were told to strip and step into the “showers”. When they were all inside, SS men would pour Zyklon B gas into the chamber which caused the prisoners to suffer a slow death of suffocation.

Auschwitz was a hell. It is difficult to understand how such events took place; why so many innocent victims lost their lives and suffered. It is fair in this scenario to ask the question “Where was God?” A quote from Father Jan Andrzej Kloczowski of Poland states,

“Auschwitz has become synonymous with inhumanity, the remoteness of God and mass murder. With the annihilating fight against the Jewish people at its centre, it was also a frontal attack against the biblical revelation and its image of man. Auschwitz must not be victorious. We must not allow ourselves to become hardened and embittered by the shock of Auschwitz, but instead reinstitute humaneness in its rights and regain the hope which enable us to believe and trust in love.” (“Did God Suffer in Auschwitz? Where Was He? Why Was He Silent?” pg. 164. Para 5.)

Auschwitz was perpetrated with a destructive force that attempted to complete the goal of the final solution, the mass murder of a race of human beings. This goal was not reached, love won as it always does, and Auschwitz was not victorious in achieving the final goal. After many years of fear and sorrow Judaism began to rise from the ashes and become a prominent religion again. Auschwitz has shown us that we must create a civilization of love with a force stronger than the one that perpetrated the camp.

There will never be a true answer to the question “Where was God?” I do not know if God was there or if there is a God, but I do know that through all the evil there was love and hope. Hope that one day the victims would again see their loved ones and freedom. Maybe God was in the prisoner who gave up food rations to an inmate in need or maybe God was in the child of war who was comforting his ill friend. Maybe the love of man is the essence of what many refer to as God.

This image depicts the rows of barracks that were used to preform inhumane experiments, torture victims, and hold prisoners.

This image depicts the wall of the gas chamber. There are scratch marks left behind by the innocent victims as they tried to escape their ultimate death.

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Fr. Maximilian Kolbe

Father Maximilian Kolbe is a Polish Franciscan Priest that died in Block 11 of Auschwitz I and a major reason why I decided to come to Poland to was to learn more about the Holocaust. My experience in high school was instrumental in forming my faith. Through retreats, theology classes and mission work, the Franciscan Brothers captured my heart and rooted it in service and solidarity. Kolbe was a major influence to me during this time. He was the perfect representation of the Franciscan motto, that I hold very dear, of preaching the Gospel at all times, and, only when necessary, using words. The retreat planned for the sophomore class of St. Anthony’s was focused on understanding the “other” and instilling an understanding that everyone has an “invisible backpack” that they carry their burden in with them. The life and mission of St. Maximilian Kolbe was used to illustrate this theme. My sophomore retreat impacted me deeply and inspired me to later become involved in coordinating and running the Kolbe retreat.

Coming to Auschwitz I and viewing where Kolbe was starved and eventually killed with injection after serving as a pillar of strength for other starving men in his cell, as well as other prisoners inspired by his selflessness in the camp, was a disorienting experience. Here, his story is among a million. A million other stories of suffering, loss, and persecution.

His story is honored because he was the only prisoner to have switched places with another in Auschwitz I. In the camp, the German Nazis minimized escapes by enforcing a policy of collective responsibility. If one man escaped, 10 others from his kommando or block would be chosen to be tortured and killed. One day, a man escaped therefore, 10 men from Kolbe’s block were to be chosen and killed. The SS lined the men up in the yard and picked 10 men. Suddenly, a man named Franciszek Gajowinczek started crying, pleading for his wife and children. Kolbe stepped forward and spoke directly to the guard, which broke every rule and could have gotten him shot on the spot. He asked the guard to switch places with the man, to which the SS guard agreed. Kolbe was taken to Block 11 with the 9 other men chosen to die in cell 18, the starvation cell. He survived in the cell for two weeks and then was injected with phenol by SS officers.

A plaque with St. Maximilian Kolbe’s prison number (16670) on it memorizing the spot in the camp where he sacrificed his life.  

Another prisoner in the camp was taken by Kolbe’s act of love and mercy. Mariana Kolodeijia was a prisoner on the first transport to Auschwitz. He was a Polish resister who survived five years in the camp. For almost 50 years, he found it impossible to speak about his experience, until having a stroke. When recovering, he started drawing, creating his testimony. Kolodeijia’s work is unique and extremely impactful. He depicted the horror and destruction in a way that empty buildings cannot. St. Kolbe was also a major influence in his experience in the camp which is seen through his art. Kolodeijia was a Catholic man, therefore Kolbe and Jesus Christ are two frequently repeated figures throughout the exhibition.

Kolodeijia’s artwork from the exhibit. There were multiple drawings of these eyes all throughout the exhibition. 

The drawings I was most struck by were the depictions of Kolbe and Christ throughout the exhibit. Several times, Kolodeijia shows Jesus being crucified with a crown of barbed wire, in a cell or on a post of the gate that surrounded the camp. In some, Kolodeijia and Kolbe are being drawn up by the barbed wire along with Jesus. Kolodeijia clearly sees Jesus suffering and dying with the prisoners of Auschwitz. In the course selection book, Jan Audrzej Kloczowski debated in an article where God was during the Holocaust and starts by asking if God can suffer. This is a large theological question that to fully answer, several angles must be considered, which are laid out in the article. However, when viewing Kolodeijia’s work is it hard not to see how God was with these people and suffered alongside them. He felt their pain and cried with them.

Another piece of Kolodeijia’s art. In this image, Fr. Maximilian Kolbe is providing support to those starving in cell 18 while the crucified Christ is watching over them.  

I am a big believer in seeing God in other people, and I believe Kolodeijia also lived with that notion. He saw God in Fr. Kolbe, as a Christ like figure who sacrificed himself for the welfare of another. There was a specific piece of art in the exhibit that impacted me. It depicted Fr. Kolbe, skeleton thin, number tattooed on this back, tied to a bar with barbed wire. In this image he is also wearing a crown of thorns. This image paralleling Christ’s crucifixion exemplifies the idea of God suffering through the suffering of his creation.

Kolodeijia portrays Fr. Maximilian Kolbe with a crown of thorns made of barbed wire.

At the museum, the Franciscan Priest gave us a photo pamphlet with some Kolodeijia’s work and a part of a letter he wrote. At the end of the pamphlet, there is a quote from Prof. Jozef Tischner which states, “the question, ‘where is God?’, hangs over the designs… but God can’t be where He wasn’t invited. Here lies man’s greatness: his ability to not invite God into his world and to even expel Him from it. And this is the world where God is driven out, expelled, and yet on the other land, at the same time, is present through Fr. Kolbe”. In Auschwitz and other camps, the Nazis expelled God, banishing Him from a place of such brutality. However, through Kolodeijia’s art, we can tell that they were unsuccessful. Through people in the camp, such as Kolbe, God remained present and suffered alongside victims. There are many accounts of Jewish prisoners keeping their faith alive, resisting spiritually against their victimization. They also invited God into Hell on earth. Their act of remaining faithful to God and not losing hope in Him is one of the most amazing acts of rebellion in the camp. Kolodeijia pays tribute to Jewish people who were targeted and murdered in Auschwitz. Kolodeijia was Catholic, therefore much of his work portrays Christ suffering, however the presence of God is with to all those in the camp through his work. He portrays God through his own tradition through most of his work and uses symbols of Jewish ritual and spirituality when memorizing them. All people of faith brought God into the camp through their spiritual resistance, fighting against the Nazi attempt to expel God through their evil actions against God’s creation.

God was there, crucified, strung up with barbed wire on a gate post, suffering with his people.

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